Oh, I wondered when I’d start getting the fat hate responses for my Sherlock post. So far it’s just the one douchecanoe, and maybe it’ll stay that way.
But seriously? The best this fucker could do was “get off your ass and go to a gym, fatty?” I’m seriously checking to make sure this person isn’t in fifth fucking grade over here. Really? Come on. I heard that shit way back when I was a kid. Worst. Attempted. Insult. Ever.
Not for nothing, but I have had so much more horrible, vicious fat haters come after me. I’ve been assaulted. This fucker just doesn’t even rise to the level of “get mad”. I’m just sort of laughing.
Because the advice this fucker is giving is basically: “become anorexic, continue to act that way until I decide you’re thin enough to be a person, which by the way will be never”.
These assholes will never actually give you the “now you’re a real person!” prize, ever. There will never be a time when they don’t hate you. Your weight doesn’t even really matter. Your health doesn’t matter. Your amount of time working out and calories consumed don’t matter.
You can be at the gym 24/7. You can eat nothing. You can starve and strain and whatever you like. You can waste away. You can deprive and overwork yourself until it becomes a threat to your life.
And they’re still not gonna give you that prize. Because they really don’t even give a shit about your weight in the end. They picked this particular topic because it was EASY, because it’s low hanging fruit, because it doesn’t take much effort in a fat-hating society to hate fat people and feel like you’re a winner for doing so.
These fuckers? They’re selective sociopaths. They lack the ability to find any enjoyment in something that doesn’t hurt another person. They literally HAVE to cause pain. They have to spend hours doing shit that they do, trolling comments and blogs and setting up their own blogs with big graphics of pigs and other things. They have to do that because they can’t enjoy anything else. Because their asses are incapable of stepping away from the hate on the internet and going to a gym to get it out of THEIR system. Because they can’t build model airplanes or read a book or play a game or learn how to paint or anything. Nope. They gotta spend all their time on getting their hate fix.
You gotta almost feel sorry for them. I mean, geez. I can enjoy so many things. Drawing, painting, writing, going on hikes with my spouse and dog, swimming, touring botanical gardens and garden in general, working with my dog on training, writing in a journal, cruising the internet for gifs and sweet justice. And it’s fun and I enjoy life. And I don’t need to hurt other people. In fact, it’s best when I do the opposite and cause people joy and happiness with what I do. I love doing that.
But these people lack that capacity.
And notice how they never give you practical tips. It’s always “go to the gym, fat ass!” or “stop eating cheeseburgers, fatty!” By the by, it’s always cheeseburgers and pizza. Never filet mignon or lobster or gruyere cheese or caviar. Never food that’s associated with higher classes. Always lower class, easy to obtain food that’s affordable for those with little money.
Could it be…*duhn duhn*…
SATAN??? CLASSISM? *church lady glare*
(With no small amount of racism to be found entangled in the whole thing as well).
ANYway, they never then go on to list all the things a the gym you can do or alternate exercises if gym isn’t feasible for you. They never go on to list other foods that might be more nutritious and how to obtain them easily and at the lowest price. Never. Not once.
It’s always just a vaguely worded demand that you do SOMETHING.
I find that funny, them just reaching for the most convenient, trite bit of bile they can find. Fuckheaded and funny.
So, anyway. I’m going to continue to be fat as in fantastic and obese as in oh my god, I’m fucking amazing. Continue to be angry. Enjoy that feigned hate and anger, it’s all you really have. Because you sure as shit don’t have a conscience or a sense of empathy.
Just thought I’d post to say to my fellow fatties that it really is THEM, not YOU. You are not and never will be the problem. Your weight, your body, your fatness, your size will never be at fault, will never be to blame. There is no amount of adipose tissue that entitles anyone to hurt you, abuse you, oppress you, exclude you, or erase you. At any fucking weight you are, you deserve better. The best, even. No number on a scale can diminish your humanity. Your weight is not an insult. Ever.
And if you need someone to come to because it’s not always so easy to laugh off the hate, the inbox is open.
[Images: Four pictures showing Gloria Shuri Nava, a gorgeous fat woman with light brown skin and her boyfriend, a thin white man. In the first picture they are side by side, his arm around her, smiling, inside and she is holding a drink. In the second, they are posing side by side, his arm around her, as he holds the camera out and they are outside in a city, in the third they are side by side smiling in front of background of a picture of a city landscape and white decorative lights. In the last picture they are facing each other, about to kiss, in front of a body of water as the sun goes down.]
From I’m Overweight and My Boyfriend’s Not. Big Freaking Deal, by Gloria Shuri Nava
and a follow-up by her boyfriend, to the fat-hating trolls who immediately swarmed the comments…
My Girlfriend Weighs More Than Me. So What? by Ali Lawrie
Good stories. Very kind of them to share. Go read! :)
The day I’ll know fat hate is over is the day when a bunch of people go up to Gloria Shuri Nava, see a fabulous fat brown woman and see him, and go, “Wow, aren’t you doing him a favor! How’d he ever get so lucky to get you to go out with him?”
She’s frickin’ gorgeous, people. He ain’t bad either, but she’s amazing.
Plot twist: A fat protagonist has a compelling arc and stays fat the whole time, because using weightloss to signify personal growth is fucked up and also lazy writing.
Second plot twist: Compelling arc for fat person involves a romance. Sexual and romantic interactions aren’t about weight and romantic interest is not a chubby chaser or loving fat person “in spite of their weight”. Romantic interest simply is interested because they think fat protagonist is beautiful, smart, funny, brave, awesome, etc. Sexual/romantic interactions between them are not a source of low brow comedy or commentary and do not differ in tone from those between thin people. Also, romantic interest is not given cookies or rewards or told they are brave or especially good hearted to be in love with a fat person.
Its the creation of an alternative fiction that is supposed to replace reality.
When the authorities insist, if you exercise and eat a balanced diet you’ll be slim. That is wishful thinking. It is a fiction they claim to be true. It makes things neat, simple and wrong.
It requires the belief that slim people eat certain kinds of things and not others. And that fat people eat other kinds of things that slim people do not eat.
And slim people are active, fat people inactive.
If anyone wants to eat what for them is a balanced diet, all well and good. They may remain the same, lose weight they may even become slim. But it is also true that eating a diet made of of overly processed foods, can also co-exist with becoming fatter, thinner or neither.
Certainly, not being particularly active doesn’t necessarily make you fat/ter or stop you from becoming slimmer, nor does activity necessarily lessen your weight.
We have all participated in this experiment, especially fat people. We’ve tested whether years or even a lifetime of calorie restriction and increased expenditure will make you slim.
This is the result. The so called ‘obesity’ crisis fat haters are whining about.
Anyone denying that, is engaging in delusion. That’s asserting fantasy in the face of reality, that’s what its called.
[Image: A photo of a pair of light skinned legs crossed with a foot wearing a sandal on a beach landscape with the text: “Me-Sponsible. Me-Sponsible: The act of being responsible to me, for the benefit of my health, happiness, and well being. Redefining body image.’]
My interpretation of being me-sponsible involves soaking rays into my skin, letting my fat thighs breathe on the beach, and acknowledging beauty in everything - including myself.
(if anyone knows the true source of this quote, please let me know, as I was unable to find an author)
reblawgin’ cause i posted this super fucken early this morning
I need to get a wrap dress in my life.
[Image Description: A drawing of a fat woman of color with glasses and eyes closed, one hand in her hair and the other behind her. Her hair is long, brown, and curly. She is wearing a maroon wrap dress that is coming undone showing a good amount of cleavage. The background is tan with a gradient feathering away from the woman in the center. ]
[Image Description: A photo of me holding up a piece of paper and with a “bitch please” smirk on my face.]
Text on paper:
I’m a brown, queer, person with a disability, fat, happy on most days first generation college student (with 20,000+ in debt). I have faced barriers, obstacles, stares, negative b.s., being poor, being broke (because there is a difference) [Forgot to add: for my entire life].
I am not your 99%.
I am not the 1%.
I’m not even included! (Unless I force myself. But why should I have to?)
More of these, please.
A couple may have their obese children removed after social services ruled they had not lost enough weight.
But although they were placed under constant supervision and social workers observed them during meal times, no dietary rules were imposed and there was no significant improvement in the children’s weight. The family spent two years living in a special council-funded house in which they were placed under a curfew and only three of the children were permitted to live with their parents at any one time.
Critics said the case, which is without precedent in Britain, was a serious breach of the family’s human rights and exposed the worrying extent to which the State can interfere in family life.
The mother, aged 42, told the Mail on Sunday: “They picked on us because of our size to start with and they just haven’t let go, despite the fact we’ve done everything to lose weight and meet their demands.”
The father, aged 56, added: “The pressure of living in the family unit would have broken anyone. We were being treated like children and cut off from the outside world. To have a social worker stand and watch you eat is intolerable.”
How is this okay? How is this acceptable in any way?
I just CANNOT EVEN ANYMORE. I just can. not. fucking. even. I have no commentary except my rage and my hope that this family is able to heal after this and that somebody fires the great living HELL out of the social workers and other folks in the bureaucracy who perpetrated this fuckery.
[Image: Gif of the cartoon character Stitch pulling down his lower eyelids in frustration/anger.]
I’m sorry, and I’ll probably get shit for this, but raising your kids in a way that makes them obese is child abuse. The kids are young and don’t know anything about what they’re eating, it’s neglectful and abusive for parents to just let their kids eat unhealthy foods and become obese. If a parent was doing anything else that was detrimental to their child’s health it would be abuse, so how is letting them become obese, which is obviously very bad for their health, any different?
I mean, the way the parents in the article were treated may not have been the best solution, but something definitely should’ve been done.
1. You are a fucking liar. If you were that sorry about thinking something so hateful, you wouldn’t have written it in the first place. What you want is for us to pretend like you’re not a bigoted fat hater, you’re just a person with an unpopular opinion. Fuck that. You’re a fat hater. And a liar. A lying liar who hates fat people enough to think that they should be traumatized by being RIPPED away from a loving, non-abusive home because of their size or having their kids ripped away.
If you’d wish that shit on anyone for any reason, you obviously HATE them. And you are so obviously NOT SORRY AT ALL.
2. Obesity is not a disease. Obesity is not automatically bad for someone’s health. Weight does not determine someone’s health. Obesity IS NOT A DISEASE. I’m sure you’re going to blah blah blah and throw whatever obesity panic hysteria bullshit you’ve been taught by the media at me. What the fuck ever. Behold my lack of fucks given about your bad science and your even worse diet industry controlled interpretations of studies done that conclusively prove nothing.
3. Obesity is not always something that’s controllable or caused by overeating and under exercising. Notice that the parents in this piece did everything they were told, complied with all rules, and DID NOT LOSE WEIGHT. There is strong, strong evidence that there is very much a genetic component to obesity. Anecdata: I’m living proof of that because for three generations in my family, there’s been a fat sibling and a skinny sibling. My fat (size 24), my sister is a size 4. My mom is fat, her brother can’t gain weight for trying. My grandfather is thin, his only sister is the fat one. Do you really think that for three generations of my family (and probably farther back, don’t know about my great grandparents’ siblings), one sibling was either force fed or was so voraciously hungry that they ate THAT MUCH more than their other sibling? I mean, really?
4. Health policing doesn’t help. Taking the kids away offers no guarantees and putting them in the system just ups the chance that OTHER bad shit will happen to them. Unless you’re willing to say that these children should be put on starvation diets and forced to torturously over exercise until they show weight loss results, then there’s no guarantee that any so called “healthy” or “moderate” eating will cause them to lose a pound. And if you’re up for starving and torturing and abusing fat children so they’ll be thin because it’s “good for them”? You need to never be in my physical presence. Also? If you think that, you are a disgusting human being.
5. You know what else is not healthy at all? Body shaming. Causing people to hate themselves because of their weight. Stress. Yo-yo dieting. Not to mention that we don’t have reliable science to show us what long term effects there are on children who begin dieting before adulthood and/or who seek weight loss surgery at a young age. It is entirely possible that drastic weight loss measures are what’s actually harmful.
Do you even give a shit about the psychological and emotional ramifications of this on the kids? Do you know what it would do to a young mind to be told “you’re so ugly, hideous and fat we had to remove you from your parents because we think it was criminal that they let you be so ugly, hideous and fat.” Because that is the message here. Being fat is so terrible that if your parents aren’t basically starving you into thinness, you should be taken away and given to someone who will spend the rest of your childhood making you feel like you’re so hideous you don’t deserve to live.
6. There’s a difference between actual child abuse/neglect and “risk factors”, okay? Risk factors mean that it ups the chance to some degree that you may get a disease or have something happen to you. It’s like you’re drawing from a jar of multicolored balls. You could get red, green, blue, white, or black. And a risk factor? Is just someone throwing in, say, ten or fifteen extra red balls and shaking it up real good. It doesn’t mean that you’re automatically guaranteed to draw a red ball. It just means that your chances of getting one are higher than someone drawing from a jar that didn’t have those fifteen extra ones thrown in. Even if obesity automatically was a risk factor, a risk factor still does not equal a CERTAIN HEALTH OUTCOME.
6b. By your logic, any parent who does a number of things should get their kids removed from their home. Smoking, drinking, having certain professions, living in certain areas, owning certain kinds of dogs, driving a car, or even having a pool or a trampoline (hey, kids drown in pools, that’s risking their health! Can’t have that!). Actually, by your logic, most parents apparently need to get their kids removed or have government supervision in how they raise them. Hey, let’s just cut out the middle man. The government obviously knows best. Let’s just stop letting parents raise their own children. Let’s take kids to government care facilities where the experts can make sure they grow up to fit within all the predetermined parameters for health, weight, IQ, etc!
7. FUCK. THIS. NOISE.
So this morning I see that professional fat-hater Jamie Oliver has posted a petition which he’s asking people to sign in support of his “Food Revolution,” and in which he’s included the bullshit stat that “obesity in the US costs $10,273,973 per hour” (sure) and notes, in all-caps, “OBESITY IS PREVENTABLE.”
Celebrities who have signed the petition are posted in rotation: Jennifer Aniston, Eva Longoria, P. Diddy, Kim Kardashian, Ryan Seacrest, Ellen Degeneres.
It’s always nice to see wealthy people with access to the best food, comprehensive healthcare, personal trainers, private chefs, and individual nutritional plans put their names to a petition admonishing the fatties that OBESITY IS PREVENTABLE.
When there are people for whom that is not true, people for whom obesity is not preventable, for myriad reasons, to bray about how their bodies (our bodies; ourselves) are “preventable” is to engage in eliminationist rhetoric.
I will never not be fat.
“…fat people (especially fat women) die every year because they walk into doctors’ offices with complaints that are ignored by doctors who can’t see past fat. Shortness of breath? Lose weight. Whoops, that was a pulmonary embolism. Pain in your leg? Lose weight. Whoops, that was bone cancer. The first doctor I saw when I had a herniated disk in my back many years ago told me it was back pain from fat. Lose weight. I damn well knew it wasn’t muscle pain, and I knew damn well it was something related to a known cyst on my spine, but I walked and walked and walked because, well, maybe if I lost weight I would feel better. That’s what all my doctors told me. I went on a 20-mile hike through the Scottish Highlands, and went into shock at the end of it, because my disk had herniated so severely. By the time I went to the emergency room at Northwestern in Chicago after I got home, I couldn’t even walk and had permanent nerve damage to my left foot.” - by Melissa McEwan in “Imagine That” http://shakespearessister.blogspot.com/2011/08/imagine-that.html
Emphasis of the first line mine. I HAVE KNOWN PEOPLE THIS HAS HAPPENED TO. None who are no longer with us, thankfully, but I’m reminded most specifically of one girl who went in for what she later learned was kidney problems that could be fatal and have nothing to do with one’s weight but was turned away several times because, well, she was fat.
We really really really need to unlearn our bigotries about fat.
Yup. I had a class with a girl whose doctors saw “fat, Black woman” and nearly missed her pancreatic cancer. She told the entire class about it one day, how she had to fight to get her symptoms taken seriously. This shit is life and death.
THIS. Especially at intersections where the medical system really lets people down (class, gender, race, AND size), we need to re-evaluate not only what we’re thinking about fat, but about the idea of healthy and what it means and why we need to totally dismantle a system that prizes perfect health as a sign that a patient has complied with the near-infalliability of doctors (which is a BIG FAT LIE) and been a good person.
Because it’s bullshit. Because doctors are just people. People who screw up, get tired, get lazy, get mistaken, have prejudices and isms, and may frankly be only mediocre at what they do on the best of days. Investing them with the kind of authority to declare that they are right and the patient is obviously wrong even when it comes to what the patient is LIVING AND EXPERIENCING is part of where this shit starts.
I won’t get into the fact that one of the basic problems with the health care system (esp. in the U.S.) is the idea that doctors are authorities and that patients must be “compliant”. That we think of “doctor’s orders”. Doctors, at best, should be thought of as health consultants. They give advice, they recommend things, they lend expertise, but the ultimate expert and authority ought to be the patient. Because when it swings the other way, people think that bad health is a failing that must be laid at a patient’s door rather than the sign of an issue that is not a moral failing but simply a biological issue.
What really hurts patients in relation to obesity is not the weight, its the stigma and the attitudes of the doctors who give them substandard care.
[image descriptions: a brown skinned fat woman is wearing a Wonder Woman costume made out of glitter PVC. In the top photo she is standing heroically. In the bottom left photo she is turned to the side and smirking. In the bottom right photo she is standing next to a red, white and blue motorcycle.]
This is one of my favorite costumes ever. It’s based on Wonder Woman’s 1940s costume (in her first appearances she wore a skirt). The outfit was custom made for me by Curious Couture and the photography was done by Alisa Lemberg.
I couldn’t find red earrings, so I took “pearl” earrings and painted them with nail polish. I admit to being sad I couldn’t find better red boots for this photo (I eventually found a pair with white stripes up the middle).
Stunning in all possible ways. When comic books start publishing heroines like this (regularly and in their own books)? I will start reading comics again.